GIRLFRIENDS ARE THE NEW SPOUSES: Rebecca Traister

...The power of female friendship is widely dramatized and almost as frequently fetishized in fiction. From Marianne and Elinor Dashwood to Nicole Holofcener movies to recent ads for Ortho-Tri-Cyclen birth control pills, to a certain high-heeled HBO series, yarns about women's abiding affection for one another -- especially in tart contrast to their relationships with men -- have been knit into yards and yards of narrative melodrama. But as mating patterns change, and many women put off marriage until their 30s, we gain a decade of independence; a decade that might have once been dedicated to bonding with husbands and children, but is now often unfettered by men or the limitations of family. We may be single, but rarely do we spend those years without a coterie of girlfriends. We may not be growing up within the context of our marriages anymore, but we are not alone. Women become each other's de facto spouses: we practice habits of sharing and intimacy; urge each other to be stronger, sharper, to get better jobs and accept no less than just and healthy relationships.

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posted by Eve at 4:23 PM VOTE

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