Practical Polyamory

"On the other side of the table, a laid-back Dunphy, Ve Ard's latest boyfriend, sat near James Glendinning, a 37-year-old wine and liquor salesman and his girlfriend, Laura Guy. Ve Ard and Glendinning used to be lovers but aren't anymore. Guy is one of Ve Ard's closest friends.

After a while, Ve Ard got up from her spot between Neumann and Veaux and headed over to Dunphy's side. She grabbed Dunphy's hand and moved in for a kiss on the lips. Her long, red curls hid the smooch.

What was she thinking just then?

"I'm wondering if everyone is getting enough attention," she said, "and if I'm spread too thin. I'm not used to having this number of extended partners close by."
Ve Ard says she's not having sex with all of her boyfriends. But whenever she adds another lover to her repertoire, she sends him a "sexual history disclosure" spreadsheet, complete with names of partners, the types of sexual contact they had and the results of tests for sexually transmitted diseases. She expects the same in return.

So when she and Dunphy initiated a sexual relationship, they exchanged spreadsheets and she disclosed to him that she has had human papillomavirus, or HPV, a common sexually transmitted disease. They also got tested for other STDs, including HIV, and shared the results with each other - and with Neumann.
"Because I'm sexually involved with her, any new diseases will affect me," Neumann says. . ."
posted by maggie at 1:49 PM VOTE

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